Spread The F Word
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Dec 29, 2009
Dec 10, 2009
Dec 4, 2009
For your convenience, I have compiled a list of links to my F Minus hate mail blogs. I will add to this list as the hate rolls in. Enjoy!
- Hate Male
- Large Font Edition
- Time is On My Side
- Chuck Norris Always Gets F Minus
- Do You Hate Clown?
- Stop Making Me Think Things!
- Haet Mail
- It's A Squirrel
- I Thought We Settled This
- Spoke Too Soon
- The Comic Spectrum
- Agitated Nerds
- Turtle Store
- Trees 101
- Conspiracy Mail
- Oh Mow You Didn't
- The Face of Hate
- Children? Not a Fan.
- Helpful Hate Mail
- Citation Needed:
I did a lot of life drawing in college. This means a group of twenty or so students would sit in a circle around a naked person and draw them for a few hours. Often, the same model would come in for every class, and we would do many drawings every session. I would end up with over a hundred drawings of the same person. Needless to say, this became tedious.
Once I had finished drawing the model, I would add various elements to the background of the drawing for my own amusement. A busy highway, a sewer system, or in this case, a bear:
Fast forward several years to today. I was browsing the internet and stumbled upon this photo:
The similarities are remarkable. Sure the man has gone gray, and managed to wrangle himself some pants, but it's clearly the same couple. They don't seem to be getting along like the used to, unfortunately.
If you haven't used Stumbleupon.com, I highly recommend it. It's the most efficient way to waste time on the internet.
Nov 28, 2009
I'm about to save you countless hours of frustration. F Minus books are your one-stop shop for taking care of everyone on your gift list; naughty or nice! How about that hard-to-buy-for uncle? New baby? Old grandpa? It doesn't matter, the F Minus books have you covered. How about something for the boss? Circle the comic that reminds you of him/her before you wrap it.
It's also the perfect white elephant gift. In fact, you should probably buy an extra one just in case. You never know when your neighbor/babysitter/mailman/mistress is going to unexpectedly buy you something. Be prepared!
Get the latest book or the first book at a bookstore near you or at Amazon.com.
Nov 9, 2009
This year I was the skeleton king for Halloween. No, it's not a character from something, I just made it up. Some little trick-or-treater came up to me and said, "Hello, Skeleton King!" as if we were old friends. That's what I like about kids. They don't sit there trying to figure out what movie you are from. They just see a skeleton king and accept it.
I was happy with my Jack-o-lantern this year but I forgot to take a picture before it got kind of squishy. This was my favorite decoration this year:
And here is a photo I took today:It's the only Halloween decoration still out, and I'm starting to think it might be a year-rounder.
Oct 25, 2009
Good evening, Tony. I now understand that you (perhaps uniquely) envision yourself to be quite the comedian. I also understand that no matter how complete or compelling my responses might be to those with open minds, because you lack one (not a mind, just an open one), you will reply with your unusual brand of humor, as you have done twice already, and simply continue to cover your eyes and declare that if you can't see us, we must not be able to see you. As a parent, I can assure you that none of our children (or any of our many friends' children) was fooled by that game after birthday #1. It makes me wonder whether some of the youngest ones might be in a position to bring you up to speed on that issue. If so, let me know and I'll send course materials to you. (Don't worry, they are very simple.) Your decision to ignore the fact that I take this seriously is unfortunate, but apparently irremediable. Perhaps your syndicator will agree with you; perhaps with me; perhaps with neither. I suspect the fine folks who make Frisbees, a staple of uninjured people everywhere, likely have their opinions, as well. Either way, I can't imagine that many more of your cartoons (self-graded appropriately - I give you credit for that) will burden our pages before replaced by something more interesting, such as additional room for existing comics. What's really too bad is that I do get it and you don't (more likely won't, because an absence of sufficiently engaged gray matter does not appear to be a limitation for you). Smarts, however does not supplant a social conscience gone missing without a trace. To you, an accidental death over a cliff and the violent destruction of toys with weapons are (at least for now), a paycheck, even if one necessarily split with your overseers in Korea. To others (that would include me), they are an outrage. As you point out, the free expression of ideas is important, as is the choice of every reader to ignore insulting fiction. Children do and will play with Frisbees, which is a good thing. If only children never played with guns. Your suggestion that team Frisbee "often" leads to the marriage of the two (Frisbees and guns) is a nightmare every parent (other than you, if you are one; oh, my) fears. Thanks (in the most cynical and disapproving voice that e-mail permits) for giving ideas to young people with insufficiently developed cognitive abilities to separate the imaginary from the actuated imagined. I hope never to hear of a Frisbee related shooting death: until October 20, 2009, when you introduced the idea in your syndicated comic strip, I doubt that anyone but you ever even considered the possibility. In conclusion, Tony, thank you again for your non-replies and your utter lack of interest in serious adult discourse. Cheers.
... and my final rebuttal:
Oct 13, 2009
Tea-Time! Back in August I told you that someone actually got my Tea-Time Clown tattoo. Apparently, it's taking Vancouver by storm, because the clown has struck again! This time in the form of a Clown Teapot.This is a legitimate trend now. Tea-Time Clown is going to become an industry standard like the anchor or the mom-heart or the butterfly. It's only a matter of time until I see that clown peeking out of the back of some college girl's jeans.
Big thanks to tattooer Cohen Floch. Check out his work at www.cohenfloch.com
Oct 6, 2009
Sep 16, 2009
I spotted this story posted on the NPR Facebook page:Pretty cool story. Then I noticed this comment:
Ahmed is right. Are we going to start making monkey glasses next? What if a monkey is swinging through the trees and his glasses fall off mid-swing? Do you want the fate of that monkey on your conscience, scientists? Why don't we just stop trying to cure monkey vision issues altogether? We have enough of our own problems to worry about.
Sep 6, 2009
Sep 4, 2009
Aug 19, 2009
Aug 14, 2009
With all the angry emails I get about just about every topic, you'd think a comic showing children in danger would generate an angry response. However, comics like the one above have always received the opposite reaction. This just reinforces my theory; People don't like children!
There have been a few exceptions. For instance, the mower incident from back in June. But I feel like he was more unhappy about the improper use of a lawn mower than the safety of the children.
The only other occasion I can think of was in response to this comic from way back in 2006:
This was the letter I got:
"I feel compelled to comment on today's (Sunday, November 5, 2006) strip. Normally I enjoy the humor, but today's was in poor taste. Anything having to do with children playing with, or being put in plastic bags - or laminated in plastic - should not be joked about.
That said, keep up the good work with a great, witty comic strip."
I don't know how to feel about complimentary hate mail... it gives me confused feelings.
Nevertheless, I can't completely ban a topic from my cartoon because of angry emails. If I did there would be nothing to cartoon about. People can get upset about anything.
Hey... are those the same kids in both comics? Weird.
Aug 10, 2009
Aug 5, 2009
If you look closely at today's Pearls Before Swine comic, you'll notice a shout out to F Minus from my friend Stephan Pastis. I got to meet Stephan at the Reuben awards (the Oscars of cartooning) in Orlando. I think we ended up hanging out with each other because we are both under 100 years old. (Haha, just a little joke, other cartoonists.)
We are pictured here with our book editor, Erin. Behind us in the crowd you can spot the sprightly Mort Walker (Beetle Bailey) and Bill Keane (Family Circus). This was right before Stephan and I challenged them to a vigorous game of beach volleyball.
You might have noticed some of Stephan's characters in one of my comics from a while back:Stephan has a blog too.
Aug 4, 2009
This might be the greatest thing I have ever seen.
In March of 2008 I published a comic featuring a guy named Mikey (based on my tattooed brother) regretting his tattoo choice: Tea-Time Clown.
Today I received a message from the owner of a tattoo shop in Vancouver, Canada. He told me that the cartoon was popular with his customers, and also with his tattoo artist friend.
In fact, he liked it so much, he created a tattoo flash with some alternate Tea-Time Clown tattoo designs.
His designs include a Tea-Time Clown in a race car, a Tea-Time Clown as royalty, a sad Tea-Time Clown with a broken teacup, and of course a standard Tea-Time Clown, as seen in my comic.
This was enough to make my day, but then it got better... I present to you, an actual Tea-Time Clown Tattoo!
The owner of this awesome Tea-Time Clown tattoo now has the perfect answer when someone asks the question "Have you ever done anything you really regret?"
I couldn't be more proud.
Cohen Floch -Tattoo Union, Vancouver B.C.
Aug 1, 2009
Jul 28, 2009
I've been getting an unusual amount of hate mail lately. I consider that a good sign for the most part, but I still have to wonder, who are these people? What do they look like? Who has the time to seek out the email address of a cartoonist, just to harangue him? One person in particular has sent me a few emails expressing how much he despises F Minus.
"You aren't funny...at all."
"All of the other comic strips are hilarious, then yours just wrecks it. Completely."
"I feel like closing the paper after reading your pathetic excuse of a comic."
"YOU MAKE ME WANT TO STOP READING THE COMICS ALTOGETHER"
His extraordinary anger over my little comic strip intrigued me. I decided to to a quick search for his email address and I discovered his Facebook profile.
Ladies and gentlemen, I present to you... The Face of Hate. Through his profile I learned that he has managed to wrangle himself seventeen online "friends" despite his abrasive disposition.
But I shouldn't be too hard on him. He clearly leads a difficult life, apparently in the frozen tundra, where he was forced to kill a large rodent and fashion the pelt into a crude hat for warmth.
I don't think I will continue to seek out these hate-mail writers after this experience. My dreams are already haunted by those vacant eyes and pointed snout. I've learned my lesson.
UPDATE: It turns out one of the "17 friends" is the cousin of a friend of mine, and had this to say about the hater:
"I barely know the kid. He was in my speech class and hung around the emo/goth/kids-who-wear-black group. All of his speeches were on random, less-important wars or something... like Franco-Prussian or ones that you don't normally hear about. He was also very nervous up there. I read the blog... am I really only one of his 17 friends?"
Sounds like he's down to sixteen, I'm afraid.
Jul 18, 2009
I've been getting a lot of requests for a T-Shirt with the slogan from this comic, and I wanted to let you all know that I'm in the process of making one available now. I'm also going to try to overhaul the outdated F Minus store. More on this as events unfold.
Let me know if there are any other F Minus comics you think would make a good shirt.
Jul 10, 2009
Comic counting is not an exact science, but today's comic might be the 1500th published F Minus comic. However, if you include comics from the college years and comics that weren't published nationally it's closer to 1800... whatever. My birthday isn't for five more months, so let's celebrate.
Thanks to Theo for the heads up.
Jun 20, 2009
Jun 19, 2009
Hey all, just a reminder to come see me tonight at the Barnes and Noble at Tempe marketplace for the book signing. They will also have some copies of the first book available. If you get a book for your dad for Father's day, I will draw a portrait of him in it based on your description alone. Don't worry, I'm trained in composite police sketch art.
Just to let you know, I am on Twitter, at twitter.com/tonycarrillo
Somebody is posting links to the daily F Minus comics at twitter.com/fminus, but it's not me. I don't mind unless my lawyer says I should.
See you soon.
Jun 11, 2009
To clear up some confusion, yes, that is the ocean behind the vikings. The F Minus world seems to have some ocean/land issues. Kooky!
Here's a corrected version:
And yes, that is a painting in today's (Jun 11) comic. A black and white one, apparently. Kooky!
Jun 10, 2009
The following hate mail and my response refers to this comic:
"Your strip for June 2nd:
Showing a father pushing a kid around on a power mower, and making a big joke out of it, is completely uncalled for. If you are a father, do you do that with your own children? I've never seen it done with a push mower, but I do see it once in a while on a riding mower. Do you realize exactly how stupid that is? If the kid falls off and loses a hand or foot will you make a comic strip out of that?"
* * *
Thanks for sharing your great comic idea! It's very funny. However, I don't use outside ideas in my comic strip. Many syndicated cartoonists buy comic ideas, so you might want to keep shopping it around.
To answer your question, no, I don't have any children. But if I ever do, I will definitely take your suggestion and let them ride the mower. That sounds super fun!
Good luck with your comic writing career!"
Edit- He wrote back!
"you are an idiot"
Checkmate, sir. Check-mate.
Did you miss the last book signing? You know who you are.
You're in luck! I will be at the Barnes and Noble at Tempe Marketplace on Friday, June 19th at 6:30 to sign your book and flip through some magazines. Get yourself the new F Minus book, and pick one up for a friend. Just in time for the holiday season!
Also, for the low price of one dollar, I will judge any book by the cover.
May 27, 2009
I really thought the hands-free burger device was golden, but it's only getting three and a half stars. I have a love-hate relationship with this rating system. I think I'm going to try to ignore it for a few weeks. If I don't, I fear it will soon drive me mad. Mad I tell you!
I saw Flight of the Conchords in concert last week (Thanks again Cam!) and they were great. Very funny. It rekindled my interest in trying stand-up comedy.
However, when I waited at the not-so-secret-anymore exit where the performers come out afterward (yes, I enjoy meeting famous people), they ditched me and some other nerdy fans and went out another exit. What's the deal, FotC? Too good for your fans? I met Elvis Costello with my brother at that same exit. He was a cool guy. Linz and I met Fiona Apple there too. Despite her angst, she was very nice.
Just a little Wednesday complainin'!
May 25, 2009
My friends, you all know that I post the strange mail I receive here for you to enjoy. Hate mail, crazy mail... mail about how I can't draw frogs. But today I got an email that is crazy, threatening... just plain bizarre. It may require a new category; conspiracy mail! Here it is, copy/pasted word for word (including an image of what I imagine he looks like). I promise this is a real email I got just this morning:
May 20, 2009
Two weeks ago my awesome cousin Brett got me this sweet Nagamaki sword. The action shot above captured the moment before I split that grapefruit cleanly in half. I think you know what this means... It's time for a follow-up to my popular video Sledge Time!
Any suggestions for what needs to be Nagamaki'd?